{"id":4749,"date":"2009-09-01T21:05:00","date_gmt":"2009-09-01T21:05:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.uzulmez.site\/?p=4749"},"modified":"2025-07-20T18:08:18","modified_gmt":"2025-07-20T18:08:18","slug":"gecenin-isligi-siir","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.uzulmez.site\/?p=4749","title":{"rendered":"Gecenin Isl\u0131\u011f\u0131 (\u015eiir)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

M\u00fcsl\u00fcm \u00dcz\u00fclmez, Kendi Yay\u0131n\u0131, \u0130stanbul, 2002, 96 sayfa.
Bask\u0131: Ladin Matbaac\u0131l\u0131k Ambalaj San. Ltd. \u015eti. \u0130stanbul<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Birinci B\u00f6l\u00fcm<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

GECEN\u0130N ISLI\u011eI<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

&<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00f6fkede, nefrette, sevgide
duygular\u0131m\u0131z k\u00f6relmesin.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

bitkin d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr\u00fcc\u00fc, uykusuz bitmeyen gecelerimde
an\u0131lara dal\u0131p, gen\u00e7li\u011fimin co\u011frafyas\u0131 g\u00f6z\u00fcmde t\u00fct\u00fcnce,
ayr\u0131l\u0131k ac\u0131s\u0131 ince bir s\u0131z\u0131 gibi iner y\u00fcre\u011fime;
sevdi\u011fim sesin kula\u011f\u0131mda \u00e7\u0131nlad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 i\u015fitirim
ve tatl\u0131 bir huzurla art\u0131k hi\u00e7 g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc yumamam
kendi i\u00e7imde yolculu\u011fa \u00e7\u0131kar, seni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u00fcm.
***
tatl\u0131 titrek g\u00fczel sesine hasret kald\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekten uykular\u0131m ka\u00e7t\u0131k\u00e7a;
s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131dan, so\u011fu\u011fa teslim olmu\u015f imans\u0131z istanbul’da
gecenin karanl\u0131k \u00f6rt\u00fcs\u00fc kentin \u00fczerine \u00e7ekilir-\u00e7ekilmez:
sana y\u00fcrekten yak\u0131n olabilmek i\u00e7in, g\u00fcn \u0131\u015f\u0131yana kadar
tek ba\u015f\u0131ma \u0131ss\u0131z sokaklarda dola\u015fmak istiyorum.
m\u00fclkiyetin \u00e7irkinli\u011fine odaklanm\u0131\u015f g\u00fcnd\u00fczleri
bunu yapamam.
***
s\u00f6zle, yaz\u0131yla anlat\u0131lamayan yak\u0131c\u0131 bir istektir \u00f6zlemek.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

tek bir g\u00fcn bile seni unutmad\u0131m!
olmas\u0131 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn olsayd\u0131:
istanbul’un kiriyle daha fazla kirlenmeden,
sevdi\u011fim kadar sevilece\u011fimden emin
bir sonbahar g\u00fcn\u00fc sana gelmek isterdim;
ak\u015fam g\u00fcne\u015f boynunu b\u00fckt\u00fc\u011f\u00fc zaman.
***
pusulas\u0131n\u0131 \u015fa\u015f\u0131rm\u0131\u015f, \u00e7\u00f6lde susuzluk \u00e7eken bir dervi\u015f gibiyim.
susuzlu\u011fumu giderecek diyar\u0131 hen\u00fcz bulamad\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

gizli a\u015fklar gibi a\u00e7may\u0131 bekleyen
bahar\u0131n g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemesi may\u0131s g\u00fcllerinin sab\u0131rs\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131yla
dicle’nin berrak sular\u0131nda y\u0131kanarak,
diyarbak\u0131r’da, seninle olmak istiyorum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

geldi\u011fimde, bekletmeden hemen kap\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7 ki
sava\u015f\u0131n g\u00f6lgesine \u00e7ekilmi\u015f ama, de\u011fi\u015fimi \u00f6z\u00fcnde ta\u015f\u0131yan
yapayaln\u0131z, kur’an yaz\u0131s\u0131 gibi insanlar\u0131n var oldu\u011fu
s\u0131k\u0131lm\u0131\u015f ve s\u0131k\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015f kentimde adresim belli olsun.
***
kuytulu k\u00f6\u015felerinde akrepler h\u00e2l\u00e2 pusuda m\u0131?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ka\u011f\u0131da d\u00f6k\u00fclen her s\u00f6zc\u00fck, \u015fiir olsun istiyorum.
sahte dostluklar,
raflarda bekleyen kirli dosyalar
ve i\u015fe yaramaz form\u00fcl ve say\u0131lardan s\u0131k\u0131ld\u0131m.
deniz dalgalar\u0131n\u0131n d\u00f6vd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc kayalar \u00fczerinde
-g\u00f6zlerim k\u00f6p\u00fcren dalgalarda
dalgalar\u0131n ve mart\u0131lar\u0131n sesini dinleyerek
t\u00e2 karacada\u011f’dan
r\u00fczg\u00e2r\u0131n getirece\u011fi da\u011f\u0131n\u0131k sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131n kokusunu bekliyorum.
duygusal yorgunlu\u011fu derinden ya\u015fayarak,
y\u0131ld\u0131zl\u0131 geceleri, kelebek kovalad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z \u00e7i\u00e7ekli tarlalar\u0131
ve seni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum.
***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

hegel(*)<\/sup>, acaba hangi haller i\u00e7in: “d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fclm\u00fc\u015fse vard\u0131r” diyordu?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) Georg Wilhelm Friedrich HEGEL: Alman Filozof. (1770-1831)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00f6zledi\u011fim sular\u0131n \u015fak\u0131yan sesiyle bana,
‘ilk ve son a\u015fk\u0131m’ diyen, g\u00fcl kokular\u0131n\u0131n sarho\u015f edici g\u00fczelli\u011fi:
beni, fark\u0131nda olmadan firari d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelere g\u00f6nderen
her zerresinin titre\u015fimini ci\u011ferime duyarak \u00e7ekti\u011fim
bahar kokular\u0131 de\u011fil,
yo\u011funla\u015fm\u0131\u015f sevgilerin i\u00e7kisiz sarho\u015flu\u011fudur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

a\u015fk\u0131n ba\u015ftan \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131c\u0131, \u015feytans\u0131 do\u011fas\u0131ndan olsa gerek:
\u00e7elik mavisi sustal\u0131 b\u0131\u00e7a\u011f\u0131n kar\u0131n bo\u015flu\u011funa saplan\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131n ac\u0131s\u0131yla
kelimelerin sihrine kap\u0131lm\u0131\u015f bir kimyac\u0131 olarak
l\u00e2boratuar\u0131mda s\u00f6zc\u00fckleri dam\u0131t\u0131p, her g\u00fcnbat\u0131m\u0131n\u0131n ard\u0131ndan
-hamamdan yeni \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f bir g\u00fczelin
yanaklar\u0131ndaki ter damlac\u0131klar\u0131na dokunur gibi-
vebal alt\u0131nda kalmadan sana \u015fiirler yaz\u0131yorum.
***
yazd\u0131klar\u0131m titreyen y\u00fcre\u011fine s\u0131cak \u00f6rt\u00fc olsun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

7.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

s\u0131\u011f\u0131na\u011f\u0131m olan \u015fiirlerim:
sevgileri g\u00fcl dal\u0131n\u0131n kanat\u0131c\u0131 dikenlerine as\u0131l\u0131 kalm\u0131\u015f
sevdal\u0131lar\u0131n ac\u0131 \u00e7eken kalplerinde sevgi beslese de,
inan ki \u015fiir yazmak karanl\u0131k, yolsuz bir ormanda
insan etini par\u00e7alayan dikenler aras\u0131nda yol a\u00e7maya benzer
-kanat\u0131r hicran y\u00fcre\u011fimi.
***
ger\u00e7ek kendini kan\u0131tlamada zorlan\u0131nca, \u015fiirsiz olunmuyor.
\u015fiir: y\u00fcre\u011fin \u015fark\u0131s\u0131, g\u00f6n\u00fcllerin ve duygular\u0131n dili.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

y\u00fcre\u011fe d\u00fc\u015fen ate\u015fi g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131yla s\u00f6nd\u00fcrmek m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fil!
\u015fiir olmasa, uslanmaz y\u00fcre\u011fim olanlara asla dayanamaz:
akl\u0131m\u0131n bir k\u00f6\u015fesinde hep k\u0131p\u0131rdar durur an\u0131lar, ve
k\u00f6r\u00fckler ha bire i\u00e7imde var olan yang\u0131n\u0131 s\u0131cak dokunmu\u015flu\u011fun
ve hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum;
gece ve g\u00fcnd\u00fcz\u00fcn ayr\u0131m\u0131nda olmadan g\u00f6zlerine her bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131mda
kirpiklerin u\u00e7lar\u0131ndan bazen h\u00fcz\u00fcn ak\u0131yordu
bazen de beyaz karanfil
ve sen g\u00fclmedi\u011finde de
g\u00f6zya\u015f\u0131 damlalar\u0131yla y\u00fckleniyordu h\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc siyah kirpiklerin.
***
sabahlar\u0131 kalk\u0131nca da\u011f\u0131n\u0131k sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 toplamaya k\u0131yamaz
usulca \u00f6perdim uykulu yanaklar\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

suskunlu\u011fun korkun\u00e7 dibe bat\u0131\u015f\u0131nda
\u0131\u015f\u0131\u011fa fazla h\u0131zl\u0131 ko\u015fanlar
kimi zaman sakl\u0131-g\u00f6r\u00fcnmez karanl\u0131\u011fa d\u00fc\u015fer;
karanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7inde \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n trajedisini ya\u015f\u0131yorum.
sen \u00fcz\u00fclme ve beni de \u00fczme!
b\u0131rak ge\u00e7mi\u015fi-d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnme gelece\u011fi
\u00f6telerin \u00f6tesine bak,
karanl\u0131k her gecenin ard\u0131ndan nas\u0131l olsa s\u00f6ker \u015fafak!
sen d\u00fc\u015fleri ger\u00e7ekle\u015fmemi\u015f olan beni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

gel, otur yan\u0131ma;
ya\u015famak i\u00e7in geldi\u011fimiz bu d\u00fcnyada
vaktimiz varken i\u00e7erek, bir g\u00fczel ate\u015fleyelim kan\u0131m\u0131z\u0131.
***
nedense?.. seninle oldu\u011fum zaman
voltaj\u0131 y\u00fcksek ak\u0131m yemi\u015f gibi deli \u00e7arpar kalbim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

10.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

“a\u015fk her \u015feyin \u00fcstesinden gelir”(*)<\/sup>;
biz s\u00f6zc\u00fcklerden \u015fiir s\u00fczelim.
beklen(mey)en yenilgimiz “tarihin sonu”(**)<\/sup> olamaz!
yok edemezler sa\u00e7lar\u0131ndan \u00f6pen g\u00fcne\u015fi
ve g\u00f6zlerindeki \u0131\u015f\u0131yan umut g\u00fcne\u015fini.
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc mavisiz ve g\u00fcne\u015fsiz kal\u0131r m\u0131 hi\u00e7?
hem sonra, hepten zifiri karanl\u0131kta;
senin o g\u00fczel g\u00f6zlerin
senin o g\u00fczel sa\u00e7lar\u0131n
nas\u0131l \u0131\u015f\u0131ldayacak
nas\u0131l par\u0131ldayacak?
ben \u00f6mr\u00fcmce
do\u011facak en g\u00fczel g\u00fcne\u015fin
senin \u015fiirin tap\u0131na\u011f\u0131 g\u00f6zlerinde do\u011fmas\u0131n\u0131 bekledim.
***
g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcn lekesiz oldu\u011fu gecelerde
g\u00fclen g\u00f6zlerine bakarken yakalam\u0131\u015ft\u0131m derin sonsuzlu\u011fu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) Publisus Vergilius MARO: \u0130.\u00d6. 70-19 y\u0131llar\u0131 aras\u0131nda ya\u015fam\u0131\u015f Eski Roma’n\u0131n en b\u00fcy\u00fck \u015fairi. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

(**) Francis FUKUYAMA: Japon as\u0131ll\u0131 bu Amerikal\u0131 tarih\u00e7i, Sosyalist sistemin da\u011f\u0131lmas\u0131n\u0131n ard\u0131ndan ortaya att\u0131\u011f\u0131 “Tarihin Sonu” teziyle, Bat\u0131 d\u0131\u015f\u0131 sistem ve medeniyetlerin son buldu\u011funu; art\u0131k b\u00fct\u00fcn alternatif di\u011fer sistem ve medeniyetlerin tarihin bu son devresinde Bat\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn de\u011ferlerine boyun e\u011fmek zorunda oldu\u011funu ileri s\u00fcrerek, “Yeni D\u00fcnya D\u00fczeni” d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesinin entelekt\u00fcel zeminini olu\u015fturmu\u015ftur.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

11.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

uzak bir ge\u00e7mi\u015fte de\u011fil de
sanki, d\u00fcn olmu\u015f gibi bir \u015feyler k\u0131p\u0131rdar hep i\u00e7imde.
s\u0131k\u0131c\u0131, puslu sabahlara gebe gecelerin gizlili\u011finde
g\u00f6rmek istedi\u011fim yerlerin hayali akl\u0131ma d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnce:
da\u011f\u0131n\u0131k sa\u00e7lar\u0131na tak\u0131l\u0131p kalan sar\u0131 yapraklara dokunmay\u0131
ve y\u0131k\u0131k surlar\u0131n dibinde, geceden \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f gelen g\u00fcne\u015fin
seni o muhte\u015fem \u0131\u015f\u0131k huzmeleriyle y\u0131kay\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131
ve k\u0131\u015fk\u0131rt\u0131c\u0131, isyank\u00e2r konu\u015fmalar\u0131n\u0131 bir bilsen nas\u0131l \u00f6zledim?
-sak\u0131n, beni unutma!..-
***
diledi\u011fin dile\u011fin ger\u00e7ekle\u015fmesi dile\u011fimdir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

12.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

olaylar\u0131 olduklar\u0131 gibi kabullenelim;
ba\u015flay\u0131p bitmeyen sevdam\u0131z\u0131n kentinde
fark\u0131nda olmayacak kadar delikanl\u0131yd\u0131k
-bizlerin korkak olmaya hakk\u0131 yoktu
ve \u00e7ekip gitmek elimizde de\u011fildi!?.-
ve kendi kaderimi \u00e7izme hakk\u0131mdan feragat edemezdim;
cehennemin sonsuz azaplar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6ze alarak \u015feytana uydum;
s\u0131rlar\u0131 surlar\u0131nda sakl\u0131 kentimde \u00e7etin sevdalara tutuldum,
hayat\u0131 ve kendimi tan\u0131madan \u00f6l\u00fcme hudut ya\u015far oldum.
***
az m\u0131 g\u00f6zlerden \u0131rak zul\u00fcm g\u00f6rd\u00fck?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

13.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ayd\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131 az, kara(n)l\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00e7ok gen\u00e7li\u011fimin kentinden
bana:
yang\u0131nlardan
kay\u0131plardan
s\u00fcrg\u00fcnlerden
geriye bir tek sen kald\u0131n.
sen yanan, yak\u0131lan, y\u0131k\u0131lan ve
karanl\u0131k, u\u00e7urumlarla dolu kartallar\u0131n co\u011frafyas\u0131ndan
benim kutsal emanetimsin;
ard\u0131mdan ayr\u0131lmayan g\u00f6lgem,
makam da\u011f\u0131nda a\u00e7an peygamber \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011fimsin.
***
geceler boyu az m\u0131 it ulumalar\u0131n\u0131 dinledik!?.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


-hayat\u0131 zehir, cehennem edenler
dillerini sark\u0131tarak kuduz k\u00f6pekler gibi
sinsice utan\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 gizlemek istiyorlar \u015fimdi.-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

14.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

a\u011flamak istedi\u011fimde bile, a\u011fla(ya)mad\u0131m.
bazalt(*) ta\u015flar\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131 tan\u0131kl\u0131k edebilir;
dicle kenar\u0131ndaki s\u00f6\u011f\u00fct a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131ndan akan
durgun su gibi ge\u00e7medi gen\u00e7li\u011fim
ve o serin sulara sevdayla sarkan
narin s\u00f6\u011f\u00fct yapraklar\u0131n\u0131n suyla \u00f6p\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc\u011f\u00fc
-\u0131\u015f\u0131kla oyna\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi
tatl\u0131 bir s\u00fck\u00fbt i\u00e7inde olmad\u0131 hayat\u0131m.
***
\u00e7ok k\u0131sa s\u00fcrer ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n son saatleri,
belki hat\u0131rlars\u0131n:
ayr\u0131l\u0131rken ‘ho\u015f\u00e7a kal!’ bile diyememi\u015ftim,
bekliyordu beni gecelere kurulu tuzaklar;
uzunca bir s\u00fcre hayat\u0131n \u00f6tesine s\u0131n\u0131r ya\u015fad\u0131m
-k\u0131l pay\u0131 \u00f6l\u00fcmlerden s\u0131yr\u0131ld\u0131m.
***
(iz b\u0131rakarak) y\u0131llar nas\u0131l da h\u0131zl\u0131 ge\u00e7iyor
sanki, “y\u0131llar bir kadeh\u00e7ik buzlu rak\u0131”(**)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) Bazalt: Koyu renkli, sert, bir \u00e7e\u015fit yanarda\u011f k\u00fctlesi; Diyarbak\u0131r ve \u00e7evresinde bol bulunan siyah ta\u015f. Diyarbak\u0131r’da surlar, cadde ve sokaklar ve eski yap\u0131lar\u0131n \u00e7o\u011fu bu ta\u015flardan yap\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

(<\/em>**) Hasan H\u00fcseyin Korkmazgil: Emek, bar\u0131\u015f ve \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fck temalar\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7arp\u0131c\u0131 imgelerle i\u015fleyen \u015fair. (1927-1984)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

15.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

korkaklar hep kurnaz olur ya
ben y\u0131ld\u0131zlara bel ba\u011flad\u0131m
ve a\u00e7 kurt ulumalar\u0131na
ve gecelere kurulu tuzaklara ald\u0131rmadan
tehlikeli yollarda y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fcm;
senin i\u00e7in hep ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 belalara sald\u0131m.
***
a\u015fka kilit vurulmas\u0131 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn m\u00fc?
ozan dedi\u011fin duygu zengini olur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

16.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015fimdi ise, zaman t\u00fcnelinde an\u0131lara dal\u0131p
ser\u00e7elerin t\u00fckenmez \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 dinlemek
ve \u00e7i\u00e7ek a\u00e7m\u0131\u015f badem a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131nda
derin uykulara dalmak istiyorum;
r\u00fczg\u00e2rda savrulmu\u015f kokulu ipek sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131
kendi ellerimle g\u00fcne\u015fe boyamak istiyorum.
***
ula\u015f\u0131lmas\u0131 zor metafizik.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

17.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

zaman sonsuzlukta aka dursun:
istanbul’da, sabahlar\u0131 h\u00fcz\u00fcnlendirici sessizlik ve sensizlikte
do\u011fan g\u00fcne\u015fin \u0131\u015f\u0131klar\u0131yla y\u0131kansa da koca \u00e7\u0131narlarla \u00e7evrili
kur\u015fun\u00ee cami kubbeleri
ve g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcnde gezintiye \u00e7\u0131kan s\u00fct beyaz bulutlar\u0131
sel\u00e2mlasa da minarelerin alemleri
siyah, ya\u011fmur y\u00fckl\u00fc bulutlar\u0131n g\u00f6r\u00fcnmesiyle
yaz, zorunlu olarak yerini h\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc sonbahara b\u0131rak\u0131r;
ku\u015fluk vaktinin ya\u011fmur bulutu kaplar g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc
ve art\u0131k penceremden eskisi gibi odama d\u00fc\u015fmez olur g\u00fcne\u015f.
-dizlerimde ba\u015flar s\u0131z\u0131-
***
yine duygular\u0131m\u0131n ak\u0131\u015f\u0131na kap\u0131ld\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

18.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

d\u00fc\u015flerim ge\u00e7mi\u015fe d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerim gelece\u011fe
d\u00f6n\u00fck olmas\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fck!
ama, yine de her i\u00e7i\u015fte
y\u0131llanm\u0131\u015f \u015farab\u0131n i\u00e7inde sakl\u0131
ci\u011feri yakan kor ate\u015f yakar\u0131yor ci\u011ferimi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


gerilim alt\u0131nda,
d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekten mest olmu\u015f,
dinliyorum yar\u0131nlar\u0131n\u0131 bilmeyenlerin sanc\u0131l\u0131 hik\u00e2yelerini.
\u00e7aresizlik kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda \u00e7aresiz kald\u0131m;
\u00fcrk\u00fct\u00fcyor beni sessizli\u011fin duyulmaz sesi,
peri\u015fan ediyor eylemsizlik ve isyan\u0131n diyalekti\u011fi.
***
ac\u0131 \u00e7ekiyorsam sevgimdendir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

19.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ya\u015fama tutkun isteklerimle
yapmak zorunda kald\u0131klar\u0131m aras\u0131nda
sarka\u00e7 gibi sal\u0131nmaktan b\u0131kt\u0131m!
kas\u0131rgan\u0131n i\u00e7inde bulunman\u0131n heyecan\u0131n\u0131 ar\u0131yorum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


biliyorum, bir olan bir daha olmaz yeniden
ama yine de ben, g\u00f6z kama\u015ft\u0131ran ilahi g\u00fczellikteki
a\u015fk\u0131n g\u00fczel \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011fi, g\u00fcl yapra\u011f\u0131 dudaklar\u0131nla \u00f6pmeni bekliyorum.
fazla bekletme!
yoklu\u011funda, g\u00fcne\u015fin yak\u0131c\u0131 s\u0131cakl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda bile
yaprak u\u00e7lar\u0131ndan akan \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131l\u0131 damlalar \u00fc\u015f\u00fcr,
toprak suya incinir.
***
bir zamanlar ne b\u00fcy\u00fck hayallerimiz vard\u0131;
\u015fimdi, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck hesaplar\u0131n insanlar\u0131 olduk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

20.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

dinle g\u00f6zlerimin sevinci:
yapraklar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00fcne\u015fe do\u011fru a\u00e7\u0131p
\u015f\u00fckranlar\u0131n\u0131 sunan a\u011fa\u00e7lar
ve \u0131sl\u0131k \u00e7alan r\u00fczgara e\u015flik eden \u015fark\u0131lar
ve a\u015fka terc\u00fcman bak\u0131\u015flard\u0131r
\u015fimdinin i\u00e7inde gelece\u011fin gizini ta\u015f\u0131yan;
duygu ve tutkular\u0131n dinamik \u00f6z\u00fcd\u00fcr
her sabah erkenden beni yataktan kald\u0131ran;
s\u0131cak bir sevgidir
do\u011fumla \u00f6l\u00fcm aras\u0131nda s\u0131\u011f\u0131naca\u011f\u0131m tek liman.
***
hem birlikte ya\u015fay\u0131p hem \u00f6zlem duymak, nas\u0131l oluyor?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

21.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

damarlarda akan ya\u015fama s\u0131v\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 dahi donduran
allahs\u0131z so\u011fuk\/yaln\u0131z gecelerimde
\u00e7i\u00e7ek desenli yorgan\u0131ma ne kadar sar\u0131lsam da;
katran karas\u0131 gecelerin koynunda tarifi imk\u00e2ns\u0131z ac\u0131 \u00e7eker,
sensizlikten \u00fc\u015f\u00fcr, b\u00fcz\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr bedenim:
\u00e7\u0131nlar kula\u011f\u0131mda sesin ve a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 duyar\u0131m ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n.
***
hayat; do\u011farken \u00e7ekilen ac\u0131larla
\u00f6l\u00fcrken \u00e7ekilen ac\u0131lar aras\u0131ndaki varolu\u015f mudur?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

22.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00f6z de\u011fi\u015fmesi gerekeni bilincinde ta\u015f\u0131yarak
baharda kusursuz canlan\u0131r uyum i\u00e7inde do\u011fa
-s\u00fcrekli yenilenir evren
ve ay \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131nda y\u00fcre\u011fe d\u00fc\u015fen a\u015fk tohumuyla da
do\u011fan\u0131n g\u00fczelli\u011fi daha ba\u015fka bir anlam kazan\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


nas\u0131l olsa, bahar\u0131n geli\u015fine birlikte sevinece\u011fiz;
bo\u015f ver, sen u\u00e7u\u015fan sa\u00e7lar\u0131nda dalgaland\u0131r ruhumu,
\u00f6l\u00fcm ge\u00e7 olmu\u015f erken olmu\u015f ne \u00f6nemi var?
\u00f6nemli olan birlikte nas\u0131l bir \u00f6m\u00fcr s\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fcz.
***
sevi\u015firken kar\u0131\u015f\u0131yordu soluklar\u0131m\u0131z,
\u00f6l\u00fcnce de kar\u0131\u015facak m\u0131 yar\u0131n toprakta bedenlerimiz?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

23.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

sonsuzluk ile zaman aras\u0131ndaki ezeli sava\u015fta
benim ilk nefesim ile son nefesim aras\u0131d\u0131r \u00f6mr\u00fcm;
ama her ge\u00e7en g\u00fcn t\u00f6rp\u00fcl\u00fcyor \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fc nefesim.
oysa\u2026 benim \u00e7ok acelem var
f\u0131rt\u0131nan\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcndeki bulutlar gibi\u2026
***
ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z an’lar\u0131n toplam\u0131d\u0131r hayat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

24.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0131\u015f\u0131kt\u0131r g\u00f6lgeyi yaratan.
sevgi ger\u00e7ek sevgiyse kendini t\u00fcketmez
-\u00f6z niteli\u011fini yitirmez.
y\u0131ld\u0131zlar bile kayd\u0131\u011f\u0131nda ard\u0131nda \u0131\u015f\u0131kl\u0131 bir iz b\u0131rak\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


sen, kayan y\u0131ld\u0131zlar gibi \u00e7ok uzaklarda olsan da
sakl\u0131 bir muska gibi hasretini hep koynumda ta\u015f\u0131d\u0131m:
g\u00fcl yapra\u011f\u0131 \u00fcst\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015fen gecenin nemi gibi
kadife yumu\u015fakl\u0131\u011f\u0131nla daima d\u00fc\u015flerimde oldun.
***
gece \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fckt\u00fcr;
sokaklar\u0131 panzerler teslim alsa da, herkes kendi r\u00fcyas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcr.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

25.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

y\u00fcre\u011fi yananla y\u00fcre\u011fi yanan
ve \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fc t\u00fcketme eyleminde bana yolda\u015f olan;
ruhunun esrar\u0131n\u0131 de\u015fifre eden
g\u00f6zlerindeki bak\u0131\u015fa tak\u0131l\u0131p kalan g\u00f6zlerime bak
ve yer \u00e7ekiminin a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan kurtul,
ya\u011fmurlu bu bahar ak\u015fam\u0131nda sarho\u015f ol
-it elinin tersiyle zaman\u0131!..
her nefesimizde nas\u0131l olsa t\u00fckeniyor \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcz,
hangimizin seven, hangimizin sevilen oldu\u011funun bir \u00f6nemi yok!
biz, sevginin \u00f6tesinde sevmedik mi birbirimizi?
-i\u00e7ki masalar\u0131nda verilen bir s\u00f6z de\u011fil ki bizimkisi!-
***
ben sevdi\u011fim kadar sevilece\u011fimi bilirim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

26.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ya\u015fam\u0131 olanaks\u0131z k\u0131lan dayan\u0131lmaz \u00e7irkinlikleri unut!
birlikte,
dikenli telleri a\u015farak gelmedik mi bu g\u00fcnlere?
\u0131slak g\u00f6zlerden akan damlalar art\u0131k dursun!<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bilirsin:
a\u015fk\u0131n \u00e7ekim kuvveti, kendine \u00e7eker her g\u00fczelli\u011fi
ve \u00e7irkinlikten yana ne var ise kald\u0131r\u0131p atar itme kuvveti.
s\u0131rf newton(*) yasas\u0131 gere\u011fi
meyve ve yapraklardan a\u011f\u0131rla\u015fmaz ki a\u011fa\u00e7 dallar\u0131!?.
***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc g\u00f6zlerine as\u0131l\u0131 kald\u0131 y\u00fcre\u011fim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) Isaac NEWTON: \u0130ngiliz bilim adam\u0131, evrensel \u00e7ekim kuvvetinin yarat\u0131c\u0131s\u0131.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

27.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

g\u00fcn bahar kokuyor.
g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 saklamana gerek yok;
gel, kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131kl\u0131 kristal kadehlerin \u00e7\u0131nlamalar\u0131 aras\u0131nda
so\u011fuktan terlemi\u015f \u015fi\u015fe \u015fi\u015fe rak\u0131larda unutal\u0131m ac\u0131lar\u0131.
sen i\u00e7mesen de bari yan\u0131mda ol, ben i\u00e7erim;
yeter ki dudaklar\u0131m asil ruhunun dokunulabilir co\u011frafyas\u0131
o narin \u00f6zge tenine dokunsun.
***
ne isteklerin ne de bilginin sonu olabilir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

28.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

kristal g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemeni \u00f6zledim, inanmasan da dinle beni:
bahar kokan \u00e7i\u00e7eklerde ve ar\u0131n\u0131n \u00e7i\u00e7eklerden bal al\u0131\u015f\u0131nda
-g\u00fcvercinin kanat vuru\u015funda
ve co\u015fkuyla akan \u0131rma\u011f\u0131n b\u00fckl\u00fcm b\u00fckl\u00fcm ak\u0131\u015f\u0131nda
ve geceleri g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcnde \u0131\u015f\u0131ldayan y\u0131ld\u0131zlar\u0131n g\u00f6z k\u0131rp\u0131\u015f\u0131nda
ve l\u00e2boratuarda bulu\u015fu yap\u0131lan her yeni \u015feyde
ve s\u00f6ylenen sevda t\u00fcrk\u00fclerinde, okunan a\u015fk \u015fiirlerinde
yani g\u00fczel olan her \u015feyde benim i\u00e7in hep sen vars\u0131n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


inanmasan da \u0131slak g\u00f6zlerimden akan ya\u015fa bak!
dudaklar\u0131m s\u00f6ylemese de, ele vermiyor mu g\u00f6zlerim?
***
elektriksel bir ak\u0131\u015ft\u0131r sevmek.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

29.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

hi\u00e7 uza\u011f\u0131mda olmad\u0131n, hep kanayan arzum oldun.
g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131na duyarl\u0131 g\u00f6zlerinin huzmesini her hat\u0131rlad\u0131\u011f\u0131mda
ve ay \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131nda yarpuz kokular\u0131n\u0131n mest edici sarho\u015flu\u011funda
ye\u015fil kurba\u011falar\u0131 her dinledi\u011fimde
ve gecenin sessizli\u011fini bozan
c\u0131rc\u0131r b\u00f6ce\u011finin davetk\u00e2r sesini her dinledi\u011fimde
ve esen r\u00fczg\u00e2r\u0131n m\u00fczi\u011fiyle sal\u0131nan sararm\u0131\u015f
alt\u0131n ba\u015fakl\u0131 bu\u011fday tarlalar\u0131n\u0131 her seyretti\u011fimde
ve elmas \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131nda parlayan salk\u0131m \u00fcz\u00fcm tanelerinin
tatl\u0131 \u015f\u0131ras\u0131ndan yap\u0131lan kan k\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 \u015farab\u0131 her i\u00e7ti\u011fimde
g\u00fcnah\u0131n boynuma, akl\u0131ma hep sen d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyorsun nar \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011fim.
***
ya\u015fama ba\u015fka bir boyutta devam etmek nas\u0131l bir \u015fey?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

30.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

nereden bileceksin seni nas\u0131l d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fc?
geceleri odamda g\u00fcl kurusu renkli a\u011f\u0131r yorgan\u0131ma sar\u0131l\u0131p
yast\u0131\u011fa ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 her koydu\u011fumda
g\u00fcl teni bedeninin kokusu burnumda
mutlu d\u00fc\u015flerine dal\u0131yorum sonsuz bozk\u0131rlar\u0131n;
g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00f6n\u00fcnden hi\u00e7 gitmiyor
r\u00fczg\u00e2rda u\u00e7u\u015fan metilen mavisi boyun ba\u011f\u0131n
ve a\u011fustos gecelerinde parlayan sa\u00e7 ba\u011f\u0131n.
***
her zaman a\u015fk\u0131n g\u00fczel \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011fi ol!..
a\u015fk\u0131m\u0131z eskimi\u015f foto\u011fraflarda kalmas\u0131n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

31.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

derin oluyor duygusal ac\u0131lar.
sevdas\u0131 olan\u0131n \u015fiiri,
derdi olan\u0131n s\u00f6z\u00fc olur;
bende her ikisi de var,
buna y\u00fcrek mi dayan\u0131r?
***
metafizik bir g\u00fc\u00e7le sevdim seni.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

32.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

sonbahar\u0131n geli\u015fiyle
a\u011fa\u00e7larda yapraklar renk de\u011fi\u015ftirmeye
-d\u00fc\u015fmeye ba\u015flad\u0131.
ben ise ba\u015fka hi\u00e7bir \u015fey d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeden
seni d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyor\/d\u00fc\u015f kuruyorum
kendi kendime:
bir insan\u0131n seveni yoksa hi\u00e7bir \u015feyi yoktur diyorum
ve kalbi bo\u015f bir insandan daha fakir bir insan var m\u0131
bilmiyorum!?.
***
hi\u00e7bir \u015feyi olmayan, bir \u015fey verebilir mi?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

33.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

arad\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u015feyi hen\u00fcz bulamad\u0131m;
en iyisi k\u0131rlang\u0131\u00e7lar\u0131n geli\u015fini beklemek.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bak!.. eyl\u00fcl ya\u011fmurlar\u0131n\u0131n h\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131
ve sert r\u00fczg\u00e2rlardan geriye kalm\u0131\u015f
a\u011fa\u00e7 dal\u0131ndaki sararm\u0131\u015f tek yaprak titriyor;
eminim, o da benim gibi yaln\u0131zl\u0131ktan \u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor.
***
gecenin di\u011fer ad\u0131d\u0131r \u00f6zlem.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

34.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

an\u0131lar akl\u0131m\u0131 rehin ald\u0131.
so\u011fuk gecenin konuklar\u0131;
sokak lambalar\u0131n\u0131n kirli \u0131\u015f\u0131klar\u0131,
mezarl\u0131ktan gelen k\u00f6pek, karga sesleri
ve mahallenin u\u011fursuz duman kokular\u0131
s\u00fcrg\u00fcn ediyor beni gen\u00e7li\u011fimin kentine.
***
seninle oldu\u011fum zamanlar ne \u00e7i\u00e7ekliydi hayallerim,
akl\u0131m\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131mdan al\u0131rd\u0131 \u0131l\u0131k dudaklar\u0131n
-\u0131\u015f\u0131kla dans eden g\u00f6zlerin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

35.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

senden ayr\u0131lal\u0131 belli;
kambur geziyorum
dik gezmeyi unuttum,
sana geldi\u011fim g\u00fcn
belimi belki do\u011frulturum.
***
ayr\u0131l\u0131k (zamana ba\u011fl\u0131) fazla uzun s\u00fcr\u00fcnce,
\u00f6zlem de (do\u011fru orant\u0131l\u0131) artar, ben bu y\u00fck\u00fc kald\u0131ramam.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

36.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ya\u011fmur sonras\u0131 sonbahar g\u00fcnlerinde
d\u00f6k\u00fclen sar\u0131 k\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 ye\u015fil yapraklarla kapl\u0131
a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131n alt\u0131nda seninle el ele dola\u015fmay\u0131 d\u00fc\u015flerken
isterim ki sadece da\u011flar\u0131n aras\u0131ndan
k\u0131vr\u0131larak akan k\u00f6p\u00fckl\u00fc sular\u0131n \u00e7\u0131\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131
ve kendini havada r\u00fczgara b\u0131rak\u0131p s\u00fcz\u00fclen
dal\u0131ndan yeni kopmu\u015f sararm\u0131\u015f bir hazan yapra\u011f\u0131n\u0131n
yere d\u00fc\u015f\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcn sesi b\u00f6ls\u00fcn sessizli\u011fi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


ve bir de olmas\u0131 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn olsayd\u0131
dostlu\u011fumuza h\u00fcrmetten s\u0131cak h\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc bir \u00f6zlemle
\u00f6pmek isterdim her milimetre karesi dicle kokan g\u00fcl teni bedenini.
***
dicle’nin sessiz ve derin akan suyunda y\u0131ka ruhumu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

37.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

derin denizlerde vurgun yememi ba\u011f\u0131\u015fla.
ya\u011fmurun camlar\u0131 d\u00f6vd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc geceler;
kendimi atomlara ay\u0131r\u0131p,
par\u00e7alar\u0131m\u0131 co\u011fraf\u00ee b\u00f6lgelerine savurmam\u0131
d\u00f6rt g\u00f6zle bekledi\u011fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnemedim?
***
a\u011f\u0131r bir ya\u011fmur bulutu olup as\u0131l\u0131 kalamad\u0131m karacada\u011f’a
-vessel\u00e2m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130kinci B\u00f6l\u00fcm<\/strong>
KEND\u0130M OLMAYA \u00c7ALI\u015eIYORUM<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

&
y\u00fcre\u011fimden ge\u00e7enleri s\u00f6ylemek isterim hep
ama nedense dilim dolan\u0131r.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

bana \u00f6yle mahcup bakma,
surlardaki yorgun, soylu \u00e7ift ba\u015fl\u0131 kartal!
d\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc
bug\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc
yar\u0131n\u0131m\u0131z\u0131
karanl\u0131kta kana boyad\u0131lar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


hangi kurban kan\u0131
temizleyebilir i\u015flenen bu g\u00fcnahlar\u0131?
***
\u015f\u00fcphe k\u00f6\u015fe ba\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 tuttu, kendi kendimizden korkar olduk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

her insan\u0131n vard\u0131r mutlak noksan bir yan\u0131
-hi\u00e7 kimse g\u00fcn\u00e2hs\u0131z de\u011fil!-
ama \u015feytan\u00ee bir \u015feydir uyum denen teslimiyet;
bir ba\u015flad\u0131 m\u0131 ya da \u00e7ekim alan\u0131na girdin mi
eninde sonunda kurbanl\u0131k koyun mis\u00e2li
-insan\u0131n insanl\u0131ktan \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131 an-
kasab\u0131n ard\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fersin.
***
sorumluluk a\u011f\u0131r silaht\u0131r, herkes \u00fczerinde ta\u015f\u0131yamaz!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ya\u015fam\u0131n s\u00fcrekli ak\u0131\u015f\u0131yla birlikte hareket etmek,
uzun soluklu y\u00fcr\u00fcmek
ve derinlemesine d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmek i\u00e7in:
sa\u011flam bir duru\u015f
sa\u011flam bir kafa
devrimci bir ruh gerekir.
anl\u0131k doyumlar\u0131n sefilleri
veya zihinsel k\u0131r\u0131mla k\u0131s\u0131rla\u015fan omurgas\u0131zlar
hi\u00e7bir zaman anlamak istemez \/anlayamaz bunu.
***
k\u00f6leler k\u00f6leliklerini kabul ettikleri s\u00fcrece k\u00f6le kal\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131k kadar negatif bir g\u00fc\u00e7 yoktur.
karanl\u0131kta kald\u0131\u011f\u0131 i\u00e7in g\u00f6r\u00fclmeyen
ve \u015feytan\u0131n bile akl\u0131na gelmeyecek hileleri
ve bu topraklara \u00f6zg\u00fc \u015fark kurnazl\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u00fcnerleri
ve su kat\u0131lmam\u0131\u015f ahlaks\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u00f6rne\u011fi sinsi bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131n ard\u0131ndaki
hainli\u011fi sezmek
y\u0131lan\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fcndeki p\u0131r\u0131lt\u0131y\u0131 yakalamaktan daha zordur.
***
g\u00fcl yapraklar\u0131yla s\u00fcslenmi\u015f
kurulu, yaman tuzaklara d\u00fc\u015fmeyenlere
ve pisli\u011fe bula\u015fmadan ya\u015fayabilenlere a\u015fk olsun!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

egemen olan, boyun e\u011fmemizi istiyor:
boyun e\u011fmeyi\u015fimiz \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcm\u00fcz olurmu\u015f.
-g\u00f6zda\u011f\u0131 hi\u00e7 eksik olmad\u0131 ki!-<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bir d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn:
binlerce y\u0131ll\u0131k insanl\u0131k tarihinde
binlerce tanr\u0131 \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclmedi mi?<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bir benim veya senin \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fcn ne k\u0131ymeti var;
o, her \u015feye muktedir y\u00fcce tanr\u0131lar\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fcn yan\u0131nda?
***
bir kez do\u011far bir kez \u00f6l\u00fcr\u00fcz, yok daha \u00f6tesi!..
ama prezervatif gibi kullan\u0131lman\u0131n ak\u0131beti \u00e7\u00f6pl\u00fckten \u00f6tesi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

do\u011frusal (olmayan) bir zaman ak\u0131\u015f\u0131nda
ak\u0131p giden g\u00fcnlerimi bu a\u00e7\u0131dan de\u011ferlendirince
geriye kalan g\u00fcnlerimin k\u0131ymetini \u00e7ok daha iyi anl\u0131yorum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


\u00e7izilen yolda g\u00f6zleri ba\u011fl\u0131 y\u00fcr\u00fcmeyi sevmem
ve k\u0131r\u0131k leblebi gibi ayaklar alt\u0131nda ezilmeyi g\u00f6ze alamam:
kirlenmi\u015fliklerin ortas\u0131na ba\u011fda\u015f kurup, olanlar\u0131 kabullenemem;
\u00e7ileden \u00e7\u0131kart\u0131r beni, \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fck yumurta kokulu pis ili\u015fkiler.
***
beni ayakta tutan, payla\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ortak de\u011ferlerdir;
ya\u015fama ba\u011flayan ise, g\u00fczel \u015feyleri seninle payla\u015fma iste\u011fidir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

7.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

y\u0131llar\u0131n say\u0131sal a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131 alt\u0131nda
bedenim eskise de
bedenim e\u011filse de
bedenim ezilse de
ruhumu ezdirmemeye,
bilinmeyeni bilmeye
                    \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131m.
***
omuzlar\u0131mdaki a\u011f\u0131r bir y\u00fck!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr ve bilge insanlardan:
aziz augustinus;
“aldan\u0131yorsam var\u0131m”
ren\u00e9 descartes;
“d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum \u00f6yleyse var\u0131m”
andr\u00e9 gide;
“duyumsuyorum, \u00f6yleyse var\u0131m”
ve albert camus;
“ba\u015fkald\u0131r\u0131yorum, \u00f6yleyse var\u0131m” diyor.
***
normal ve olanakl\u0131n\u0131n s\u0131n\u0131rlar\u0131 dahilindeki
koku\u015fmu\u015f, hafif-defolu ili\u015fkiler a\u011f\u0131n\u0131n sarmalad\u0131\u011f\u0131
s\u0131radanl\u0131k tiksinti verdi\u011finden
dahil olamad\u0131m ‘s\u00fcr\u00fc’ye, gev\u015fedi ‘herkes’le aramdaki ba\u011f.
elimden ba\u015fka t\u00fcrl\u00fcs\u00fc gelmiyor. bu nedenle:
bilge insanlar\u0131n dediklerine ilave olarak;
h\u00e2l\u00e2 “farkl\u0131y\u0131m, demek ki var\u0131m” diyorum
ve kendim olmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum.
***
herkes kendi yoluna gider.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aziz Augustinus: \u00dcnl\u00fc H\u0131ristiyan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. (354-430)
Ren\u00e9 Descates : Frans\u0131z filozof. (1596-1650)
Andr\u00e9 Gide : Frans\u0131z yazar ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. (1869-1951)
Albert Camus : Frans\u0131z yazar ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. (1913-1960)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ayk\u0131r\u0131l\u0131k ac\u0131 verir,
versin!
haki rengin ve dolar\u0131n a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131 alt\u0131nda
kal\u0131ba uymak bana g\u00f6re de\u011fil!<\/p>\n\n\n\n


az m\u0131 tuttuk korkular\u0131n n\u00f6betini,
pek \u00e7ok ac\u0131n\u0131n tatmad\u0131k m\u0131 tad\u0131n\u0131?
***
su\u00e7lamalar, su\u00e7suzlu\u011fumun belgesidir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

10.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

her zaman y\u00fckseklerde olmak
a\u015fa\u011f\u0131larda g\u00fcvenlikte olmaktan
daha iyi de\u011fil mi?
\u00f6nemli olan
nitelikli farkl\u0131 bireysel var olu\u015ftur.
bak g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcne!
kartallar y\u00fckseklerde yaln\u0131z u\u00e7uyor,
kargalar ise hep a\u015fa\u011f\u0131larda ve hem de s\u00fcr\u00fc s\u00fcr\u00fc.
***
umudumuz musalla ta\u015f\u0131nda fatiha beklemesin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

11.<\/strong>
voltaire(*)<\/sup>:
“t\u00fcm tutkular zamanla \u00f6l\u00fcr” dese de,
benim sana olan tutkum, ancak, benimle \u00f6l\u00fcr.
***
yeni bir r\u00fcyada bulu\u015fal\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*)Voltaire: (1694-1778) Ayd\u0131nlanma \u00e7a\u011f\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6nc\u00fc Frans\u0131z d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u00fc.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00dc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc B\u00f6l\u00fcm<\/strong>
BUZ VE ATE\u015e\u0130N DANSI<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

&<\/p>\n\n\n\n

g\u00fczel \u015feylere sevgi besler,
eri\u015femeyece\u011fim \u015feylere ise a\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131m.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sa\u00e7\u0131n\u0131 Tarayan<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

sevi\u015fmenin tad\u0131 ortakla\u015fad\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


a\u00e7\u0131k pencerenin yan\u0131nda divana oturmu\u015f
siyah sa\u00e7l\u0131, g\u00f6zleri yaz gecesi g\u00fczelin
ak\u015fam \u00fczeri yolumu beklerken
sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00fcne\u015fle y\u0131kayarak taramas\u0131 yok mu?
deprem yemi\u015f gibi oynat\u0131r y\u00fcre\u011fimi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m o an\u2019lar bana bahar\u0131n arma\u011fan\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130\u015fin \u00d6z\u00fc<\/strong>
ne yap\u0131l\u0131rsa yap\u0131ls\u0131n:
\u00f6p\u00fc\u015fmeden,
al g\u00fcl\u00fc koklamadan;
gece y\u0131ld\u0131zlara bak\u0131p hayal kurmadan,
eller cepte \u0131sl\u0131k \u00e7almadan,
h\u00fcz\u00fcnlenip t\u00fcrk\u00fc m\u0131r\u0131ldanmadan,
kahkahalar atmadan;
t\u00fcketti\u011fimizden fazla \u00fcretmeden,
\u00fcretimden daha az \u00fcremeden;
insanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n matemati\u011fini anla(t)madan
ileri bir ya\u015fam d\u00fczeyine varmam\u0131z ve
istemedi\u011fimiz-arzu etmedi\u011fimiz \u015feylerden kurtulmam\u0131z
m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fil!..<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bunu anlamayanlar sadece de\u011fi\u015f(tiril)ir ama asla de\u011fi\u015ftiremez.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Buz ve Ate\u015fin Dans\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

bedenim buz
y\u00fcre\u011fim ate\u015f par\u00e7as\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bedenim s\u0131cakl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131
y\u00fcre\u011fim serinli\u011fini istiyor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


y\u00fcce ama\u00e7lara \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131yor beni
asil, g\u00fcnah\u0131 soylula\u015ft\u0131ran ruhun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

G\u00fcn\u00fc Geldi\u011finde\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

              Ozan ve Utku\u2019ya<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

gecenin sahibi y\u0131ld\u0131zlar
\u015fahidim olsun ki
kendi \u00f6z\u00fcnde
canl\u0131n\u0131n organik bilincini ta\u015f\u0131yan
bir tohum nas\u0131l zaman\u0131 gelir
i\u00e7inde var olan s\u0131n\u0131rs\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6sterirse
-topra\u011f\u0131 \u00f6pt\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde
amac\u0131na y\u00f6nelik, g\u00fcn\u00fc geldi\u011finde inan\u0131yorum
o\u011fullar\u0131mda ya\u015famaya de\u011fer ya\u015famak i\u00e7in;-mutlaka,
bir anlam vereceklerdir utkular\u0131yla kendi kaderine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u00f6rt Ana \u00d6\u011fe(*)<\/sup><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1.
hava ok\u015far
ate\u015f yakar
su akar
toprak \u00e7eker.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2.
s\u00f6ylemedi deme!
\u015farab\u0131n g\u00fczel cazibe kokulu havas\u0131 bir g\u00fczelce adam\u0131 ok\u015far
ve tatl\u0131 su gibi bo\u011fazdan ak\u0131nca da kor, ate\u015f olup yakar;
ayakta duramaz, sallan\u0131r ve toprak seni kendine \u00e7eker.
-toprak \u00f6nce besler, sonra yutmaz m\u0131?-
fazla \u00e7ekme, sonra y\u0131k\u0131l\u0131rs\u0131n!
“hava, su, ate\u015f ve toprak”dan(!) var oldu\u011funu ne \u00e7abuk unuttun?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3.
var m\u0131 \u00f6yle kolay y\u0131k\u0131lmak!?.
geldi\u011fin yere d\u00f6nme iste\u011fin \u00e7ok erken,
dur hele!.. ya\u015fayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131z daha nice g\u00fczel g\u00fcnler var.
***
hayat denilen b\u00fcy\u00fck bir \u0131rma\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7inde<\/p>\n\n\n\n

akmaktay\u0131z, bazen h\u0131zl\u0131 bazen yava\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) D\u00f6rt Ana \u00d6\u011fe: \u0130lk \u00c7a\u011f Yunan filozoflar\u0131 taraf\u0131ndan evrenin temel maddeleri olarak g\u00f6r\u00fclen toprak, hava, su ve ate\u015f. Bu d\u00f6rt \u00f6\u011feden her biri, iki niteli\u011fe sahiptir. Buna g\u00f6re, toprak so\u011fuk ve kuru, hava s\u0131cak ve \u0131slak, ate\u015f s\u0131cak ve kuru, su so\u011fuk ve \u0131slakt\u0131r.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hayat\u0131n \u00d6tesi<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

               Hatice Anam’a<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1.
bir insan:
nas\u0131l bu kadar saf,
nas\u0131l bu kadar temiz,
nas\u0131l bu kadar g\u00f6z\u00fc ve g\u00f6nl\u00fc tok
ve ci\u011ferlerine d\u00fc\u015fk\u00fcn olabilir;
bunu ben sende g\u00f6rd\u00fcm
ama hayat\u0131n cilvesine bak ki, sen
kanser denen amans\u0131z\/zalim dertten \u00e7ok \u00e7ektin
-olacak \u015fey mi?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2.
ya\u015famak
g\u00fczel olmas\u0131na \u00e7ok g\u00fczel!
ama ya\u015farken \u00e7ekilen ac\u0131lar art\u0131k dayan\u0131lmaz olunca,
\u00f6l\u00fcm bile g\u00fczelle\u015fip-kurtulu\u015f olur;
senin o saf temiz y\u00fcz\u00fcnde ben, \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn g\u00fczelli\u011fini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3.
\u00f6l\u00fcm; hayat\u0131n \u00f6tesi, ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n ebedili\u011fi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4.
d\u00fcn birlikteydik,
bug\u00fcn ise telefonda \u00f6\u011frendim;
bir ku\u015f mis\u00e2li \u00f6teye gitmi\u015fsin:
buras\u0131 ile \u00f6tesi aras\u0131nda
ne kadar bir zaman
ne kadar bir yol var
s\u00f6yleyebilir misin?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5.
cenaze arabas\u0131nda ben \u00f6nde, sen arkada
u\u011furlad\u0131m seni bir gelin gibi h\u00fcz\u00fcnlerin bulu\u015fma yerinde
g\u00f6z ya\u015flar\u0131mla son yolculu\u011funa\u2026
yolun a\u00e7\u0131k olsun!..<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Saat: 00.45
22.04.2001-G\u00fcng\u00f6ren<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bazen Bulutlar G\u00fcne\u015fi Karart\u0131r<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

say\u0131s\u0131z sars\u0131nt\u0131larla sars\u0131ld\u0131m-k\u0131r\u0131lmad\u0131m;
fakat, anlayamama ve anla\u015f\u0131lamaman\u0131n s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131s\u0131nday\u0131m.
ne insanlar\u0131 anlayabildim,
ne de insanlara kendimi anlatabildim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


biliyorum:
e\u011fer insanlar\u0131 anlayamad\u0131msa,
e\u011fer insanlara kendimi anlatamad\u0131msa
kusur benim
kabahat benim
su\u00e7 benim.
***
bazen bulutlar g\u00fcne\u015fi karart\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n


\u00d6fkem \u0130\u00e7imde Sakl\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


tanyerinin a\u011farmas\u0131yla;
yorgun
\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f
\u00e7amurlara bulanm\u0131\u015f
\u00f6fkem i\u00e7imde sakl\u0131 d\u00f6nerim evime
hemen deliksiz uyurum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


uykumda,
ye\u015file hasret gen\u00e7li\u011fimin da\u011flar\u0131
beni bekledi\u011fini f\u0131s\u0131ldar kula\u011f\u0131ma.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


y\u00fcre\u011fimi zarfa koyup g\u00f6nderiyorum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kimi Zaman\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

(bence) insan;
kimi zaman
bir g\u00fcl dal\u0131 kadar narin
kimi zaman
bir ta\u015f kadar sert
ve kimi zaman da
bir \u015fahin olmal\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130syan Ate\u015ftir<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

bir tarafta, genel kabul g\u00f6ren de\u011ferler,
bir tarafta, kendi de\u011ferlerim
ve bu ikilem kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda ac\u0131 \u00e7eker bedenim
***
isyan ate\u015ftir.
sa\u011fduyu denen ortak vicdana ortak olamad\u0131m
ku\u015fkulara d\u00fc\u015ferek \u00e7ok b\u00fcy\u00fck g\u00fcnahlar i\u015fledim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yeni Bir Y\u0131la\/Bin Y\u0131la Girerken<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

televizyonlarda
ayn\u0131 isimler
ayn\u0131 \u015fark\u0131lar
ayn\u0131 sunucular.
programlarda:
dalgal\u0131 takma sa\u00e7lar
abart\u0131l\u0131 topuzlar
abart\u0131l\u0131 makyajlar
ve
daha \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131l\u0131
daha \u015f\u0131k\u0131rt\u0131l\u0131
daha \u00e7ok silikon
daha \u00e7ok smokin
daha \u00e7ok briyantin
daha \u00e7ok maskaral\u0131k
ve de
daha \u00e7ok oryantal.
k\u0131zlar biraz daha sar\u0131\u015f\u0131n
d\u00fcnya biraz daha boyal\u0131
ya\u015fam biraz daha sun\u00ee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


bir ‘y\u0131lba\u015f\u0131’ daha kutland\u0131.
d\u00fcnya yeni bir y\u0131la
yeni bir bin y\u0131la girdi.
ben ise\u2026 yine yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011fa!
***
yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131mla ne zaman vedala\u015faca\u011f\u0131m?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

01.01.2000
G\u00fcng\u00f6ren<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Haber ve Yorum Tell\u00e2llar\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

bildi\u011fimiz bayku\u015f konu\u015famasa da\u2026
bildi\u011fimiz yarasa yazamasa da\u2026
s\u00f6zlerle seslerin,
g\u00f6rmeyle renklerin ku\u015fatmas\u0131nda
kudret tanr\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131n zangocu
o kadar \u00e7ok
konu\u015fan bayku\u015f var ki televizyonlarda,
o kadar \u00e7ok
yazan yarasa var ki gazetelerde\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n


ve \u00e7er\u00e7i-tell\u00e2l sentezi i\u011fdi\u015f edilmi\u015f z\u00e2de
ve di\u015fili\u011fini pazarlayan \u00e2fet-i devran
ve insan k\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131na girmi\u015f nice \u015feytan
ve daha nice u\u011fursuz ve gevi\u015f getiren\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n


midem bulan\u0131yor
sanal yarat\u0131lan ses ve renklerden.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130taatk\u00e2r Ayaklar\u0131m<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

bunca senedir,
g\u00f6vdemin hamal\u0131 itaatk\u00e2r ayaklar\u0131m, \u00e7ekti kahr\u0131m\u0131
ve istedi\u011fim yere ta\u015f\u0131d\u0131 beni hi\u00e7 naz etmeden.
\u015fimdi ise direniyor, zamanl\u0131-zamans\u0131z \u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor
s\u0131zlan\u0131yor\/s\u0131zl\u0131yor s\u00fcrekli.
ya\u015flanmadan m\u0131 yorgunluktan m\u0131
yoksa fizyobiyolojik bir sorundan m\u0131
bilmiyorum?!.
***
zaman m\u0131 bizi eskitip bitiriyor,
yoksa biz mi kendimizi t\u00fcketiyoruz?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n


K\u0131skan\u0131yorum Sessiz Yatanlar\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

evimin balkonuna oturmu\u015f,
bak\u0131yorum mezarl\u0131\u011fa:
\u00f6l\u00fclerin yerinde dirilerinkinden fazla
dikili ye\u015fil a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcnce;
\u00e7evre uygulamalar\u0131 alan\u0131nda \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan ben,
k\u0131skan\u0131yorum kar\u015f\u0131mda sessiz-sedas\u0131z yatanlar\u0131.
***
\u00f6l\u00fcm ka\u00e7\u0131n\u0131lmaz olsa da, tatl\u0131 de\u011fil hi\u00e7!..<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

K\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck Burjuva<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00f6l\u00fcm kokan g\u00fcnlerde
g\u00f6lgeden korkmaya haz\u0131r titrek sokak lambas\u0131 gibi
asker d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnden
k\u00f6pek ulumalar\u0131ndan korkar,
f\u0131s\u0131ldayarak konu\u015fur
g\u00f6lge gibi ya\u015fars\u0131n.
sonra:
bir solucan gibi k\u0131vran\u0131p,
(gerekli-gereksiz) “yan\u0131ld\u0131k!.. de\u011fi\u015ftik!..” dersin.
bir insan ne kadar e\u011filirse, o kadar k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcl\u00fcr bilmez misin?
*<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“ba\u015fkald\u0131rma k\u00f6lenin soylulu\u011fudur.”(*)<\/sup><\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) Friedrich NIETZSCHE: \u00dcnl\u00fc Alman d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u00fc. (1844\u20131900)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sab\u0131r \u00dczerine<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

kimileri yoksullukta bulur bolluk,
kimileri de bollukta olur yoksul derim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


sabr\u0131nda sabr\u0131 vard\u0131r diyenlere,
sabr\u0131nda bir haddi vard\u0131r derim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


sabr\u0131n sabr\u0131 t\u00fckendi\u011finde de,
insanlar\u0131n h\u0131\u015fm\u0131ndan korkmal\u0131 derim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

G\u00fcl Zehirli Olunca<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

anlat\u0131lan iyi \u015feyler anlams\u0131zla\u015f\u0131r,
anlatan bilgi\u00e7 olunca.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


yap\u0131lan i\u015f i\u015f olmaktan \u00e7\u0131kar,
yap\u0131lan g\u00f6stermelik olunca.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


kurallar kural olmaktan \u00e7\u0131kar,
kurals\u0131zl\u0131k kural olunca.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


g\u00fczellikler g\u00fczellik olmaktan \u00e7\u0131kar,
insan\u0131n zihniyeti kirli olunca.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


en g\u00fczel g\u00fcl g\u00fcl olmaktan \u00e7\u0131kar,
g\u00fcl zehirli olunca.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

21.09.2000
\u0130SK\u0130-Mavi Salon<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

G\u00fczelin Naz\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

a\u015f\u0131k b\u00fclb\u00fcl dertli, hi\u00e7 susmaz;-her an,
\u00f6ter durur g\u00fcl dal\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnde.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


her zamanki gibi, h\u0131r\u00e7\u0131ns\u0131n;-aman,
bug\u00fcn yine delili\u011fin \u00fcst\u00fcnde.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


yanar\u0131m kerem gibi, halim duman;
zalim, yine bug\u00fcn g\u00fczelli\u011fin \u00fcst\u00fcnde.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u0131radan \u0130\u015fler<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

koltuk ve paran yoksa
ne itibar\u0131n olur ne soran\u0131n;
ne kadrin bilinir ne k\u0131ymetin;
bilgi mi ge\u00e7 onu, ge\u00e7erli olan para pul.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


mecburiyetten sar\u0131l\u0131yorum s\u0131radan i\u015flere\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hassas Bir Durum<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

petek bal dolu
meme s\u00fct dolu
dudak arzu dolu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

m\u00fcbarek sanki
yemi\u015flerinden bal akan incir,
buna can m\u0131 dayan\u0131r?
***
aldatt\u0131 beni g\u00fczel d\u00fc\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dostluk Hakk\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ergani ba\u011f, bah\u00e7e, per\u00e7in
Narl\u0131k \u00fcst\u00fc g\u00fcvercin
Dostluk dedi\u011fin can\u0131m
Ak g\u00fcn-kara g\u00fcn i\u00e7in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Geceleri do\u011far ay
Hilar \u00f6n\u00fc kuru \u00e7ay
Sizler sofray\u0131 kurun
Benim gelmem \u00e7ok kolay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dostlar g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn ak\u0131
Muhabbet dostluk hakk\u0131
Sizleri \u00e7ok \u00f6zledim
Bahane, \u015farap-rak\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hilar(*)<\/sup><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ergani alt\u0131 Hilar
G\u00fcne\u015f Makam’a do\u011far
Ge\u00e7mi\u015f sakl\u0131-karanl\u0131k
Hilar’da tarih yatar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ergani g\u00fcl, Hilar ba\u011f
\u0130lk tar\u0131mla a\u00e7m\u0131\u015f \u00e7a\u011f
Gururla tepeden bakar
Heybetli Karacada\u011f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ekim 2001\/Ergani<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

(* Hilar: (Sesveren P\u0131nar). Diyarbak\u0131r \u0130line ba\u011fl\u0131 Ergani \u0130l\u00e7esinin bir k\u00f6y\u00fc. Halet \u00c7AMBEL ve Robert J. BRAIDWOOD sorumlulu\u011funda \u0130stanbul \u00dcniversitesi Prehistorya K\u00fcrs\u00fcs\u00fc ile Chicago \u00dcniversitesi Do\u011fu Bilimleri Enstit\u00fcs\u00fc ortakla\u015fa “G\u00fcneydo\u011fu Anadolu Tarih \u00d6ncesi Ara\u015ft\u0131rmalar\u0131” projesi kapsam\u0131nda Hilar K\u00f6y\u00fcndeki \u00c7ay\u00f6n\u00fc H\u00f6y\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde (Kot\u00e9ber\u00e7\u00e9m) 1963\u20131991 y\u0131llar\u0131 aras\u0131nda kaz\u0131lar yap\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. Bu kaz\u0131lar sonucunda \u00c7ay\u00f6n\u00fc H\u00f6y\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fcn, Anadolu’nun en eski yerle\u015fim birimi (k\u00f6y) oldu\u011fu anla\u015f\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bu yerle\u015fik d\u00fczene ge\u00e7me, Halet \u00c7AMBEL’in deyimiyle “Neolitik(Yeni ta\u015f) Devrim olarak insanl\u0131k tarihinde yeni bir \u00e7a\u011f\u0131n ba\u015flang\u0131c\u0131 olmu\u015ftur.”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bir Ergani T\u00fcrk\u00fcs\u00fc(*)<\/sup><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bah\u00e7e \u00fcst\u00fcnde tarla
Parla Z\u00fclk\u00fcf’\u00fcm parla
Havva b\u00fcy\u00fck, sen k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck
Otur ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 salla.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Naco’nun e\u011fri ba\u015f\u0131
Havva’n\u0131n kalem ka\u015f\u0131
Z\u00fclk\u00fcf \u00e7ar\u015f\u0131dan gelir
Naco d\u00f6ker g\u00f6zya\u015f\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130ncir incir i\u00e7inde
\u0130ncir ba\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7inde
Havva Z\u00fclk\u00fcf’e \u00e2\u015f\u0131k
Cevizlerin dibinde.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(*) Parlak Z\u00fclk\u00fcf, Naco ile evlidir. Ama g\u00f6nl\u00fc Havva’dad\u0131r. T\u00fcrk\u00fc bu g\u00f6n\u00fcl
ili\u015fkisini anlatmaktad\u0131r. T\u00fcrk\u00fc Sema Ar\u0131k\u2019tan derlenmi\u015ftir.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kitapta yer alan \u015fiirlerin tamam\u0131, ilgi duyan okuyucular i\u00e7in a\u015fa\u011f\u0131da PDF olarak bulunmaktad\u0131r:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n